Anger ... a great dieting tool

So we've been away for a while.  We went to the beach with my mom. We had planned on visiting with some old Friends who were at a family reunion. I'd say that went so so. My mother was so busy being territorial that we hardly saw them.

So we went to the beach and really it went pretty well. I didn't come back weighing any more or less. But then we were home and the week we came home we had 2 birthdays and a baby shower. I know that for me the only way that I will be able to maintain a new eating pattern is by not totally denying myself during special occasions. So I didn't. And for that whole week i hovered around 280.

Then we had guests. Teenage guests. Whom my kids adored. But my mother and the guests couldn't be bothered giving my kids (or their parents for that matter) the time of day. I just kept getting angrier an angrier until today i blew up at my mother. I was so mad I wasn't hungry all day. And I'm weighing in at 278. If I wasn't afraid of ulcers or cancer or unhappiness i'd stay mad forever and get thin!!!

vacation just around the corner...

We are off to the beach in 2 days...what will that mean for this dieting??? I cannot imagine it will be good.

I'm down to 279. No thorrible since I wasn't perfect this week.

Still going strong

Its Friday. I weighed in at 280 this morning. Progress. slow but sure . This diet is doable for me because I don't really feel like there is cheating. There is everyday food and then treats. Treats are not everyday. In fact I'm looking forward to a birthday party on monday and some food I haven't eaten in a while. I know that on tuesday i probably won't have lost anything but it won't matter ( i say that now...)

Ok

here goes another day. Oatmeal is ready

Michele

and counting...

Down to 283. slow but steady. I remember that story. But when you are this heavy you really feel like you should be dropping more than 10 lbs in a week. After all I'm really mostly eating leafy greens.

But 283 is good and really if I lost 1 b every few days for a couple of pounds it will add up. 

I have to remember that this is a lifestyle change. I need to plan on eating this way for the rest of my life. Which is why when there are birthday parties and such I plan on having a little cake and food otherwise I will not be able to live my life like this.

We went to lunch today and while it wasn't a perfect meal it was pretty good. Veggie sushi and  unsweetened ice tea. Grandma S was amused that the kids only eat the insides of the sushi which means they are getting a slice of cucumber or chunk of avocado.

283...

So 2 weeks and 7pounds...

I've lost 7 pounds and while that is great it isn't GREAT. I've dieted before. In my twenties I did a medical fast and lost 50 ponds in 3 months. About 5 years ago I did a self designed diet and lost 40 ponds in about 2 months. All of those diets held me because there were weeks when I would lose >10 lbs.  I know most of that is water weight. And I also know its not the greatest way to start eating better but it really motivated me and this 7 pounds doesn't. 

So,  I'm still here . But I'm trying to find motivation from the future like riding rollercoasters with my kids ( as it is I cannot fit in most rollercoasters...)

Wish me luck.

Wow. I've been watching some tv as I cooked and let me tell you...i just saw a commercial for gastric surgery and boy are they good. How sad that they can make me teary eyed by watching a commercial. A fat man watching his young daughter do karate and a young woman wishing to travel with her beloved...

I get that it might be the right choice for people but they shouldn't be using emotional advertising to get you there... Don't take me wrong...I've thought about it for YEARS. But I also realize that that is some major surgery and I don't take it lightly and so I've always stayed away. Shoot,  one of my closest friends died after having wisdom teeth pulled. Young and healthy...everyday surgery ...and then gone and it gives me pause how easily we undergo the knife...

just a vent.

me

Here we go....

So here I am. I'm a 39 yr old American woman. Mother to 2 . Wife to 1 (that isn't a given ya know....)

About a week ago I decided that I had had enough and we started a new eating style. This blog will be a way for me to keep on track and to vent. 

I started out at 5'9 290 lbs. I don't know how I got here. I've always been big but this is huge and not good.

My two kids are small and I want to be here when they are adults. I also want to be able to enjoy their childhoods with them. As it is I cannot ride a rollercoaster with them or slide down a slide. 

So it has been about a week and I'm down to 285. Not bad. Good motivation. Just such a long long LONG way to go....

me